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Cemetery Freestyling With Kids

9/26/2016

13 Comments

 
Cemetery Freestyling with Kids from GrowingLittleLeaves.com
Cemetery Freestyling. Is that a real phrase? Well, if it wasn't before today, it is now. Cemetery freestyling is what I call going to a cemetery for no reason. You aren't going to visit, look for, or photograph any particular grave or group of graves. You're not looking for people of any specific time period or surname or for any specific grave symbols or shapes. You go just to go - maybe with the intent of getting some mild exercise or just getting out to enjoy nature a little bit.

I've previously written about doing organized cemetery scavenger hunts with my kids, but we also LOVE cemetery freestyling, especially when we travel to different places. It's a great way to learn about local history, people, and burial customs. We've done it with our kids in Memphis, New Orleans, and even just a county over in Indianapolis, but we had never done it in our own town until this past weekend. 

We are not locals to this town, and neither I nor my husband have any ancestors who ever lived in this area. We've lived here for only about five years, but, to our kids, this is really the only home they've ever known. My 3rd grade son had mentioned that they have talked a little bit about town history in school recently, so I thought, 'Why not take a little walk through the local cemetery and see what we can find?'

One of the great things about not looking for anything specific is that you can let the child(ren) guide your path through the cemetery. They are then free to gravitate towards what appeals to them aesthetically, explore what they find interesting, and formulate their own questions about individual graves and grave markers.

Indeed, the first aspects of the stones that kids tend to notice are the differences in shapes, sizes, and colors. As we walked through the cemetery, I asked my kids questions like, "What shape do you like best? Why do you like it? Which stone shape do you think was the hardest to carve?"  I think when we adults are on a mission to find a particular stone or family plot in a cemetery, we tend to bypass some of the wonderfully beautiful and artistic stones and stone carvings that belong to other families, so I highly recommend cemetery freestyling for adults as well!

Cemetery Freestyling with Kids from GrowingLittleLeaves.comMy daughter's favorite stone.
Without any suggestion from me, my son brought along his sketch book. He loves to draw, so I thought maybe he wanted to sketch some of the more unique stones, but instead he decided to write down a list of surnames that caught his eye. (He is a bit of a busy-body and likes to have something to do, even when we just do things for fun.) 

I followed along next to him and coaxed him to look at information beyond just the surname. He discovered that one stone listed the grave's occupant as a member of the Ohio Cavalry, while another was written in German, so we talked about how a person might be born in one location, but buried in another. Stones can give important clues about a person's place of birth. 

I also encouraged my son to use the years listed on the stones and figure out how old a person was at the time of death. So, we had some practical math mixed in there, too.

Cemetery Freestyling with Kids from GrowingLittleLeaves.com
Ohio Cavalry Member
Cemetery Freestyling with Kids from GrowingLittleLeaves.com
German Writing
My daughter is just learning how to read, so my husband and I had to read her the names when she asked what they said. However, she does understand how to read years, and she had a good time practicing that skill when looking at the stones.
Cemetery Freestyling with Kids from GrowingLittleLeaves.com
Reading the years.
We found U.S. Military Veterans from the Mexican War, Civil War, WWI, and WWII. We found entire families buried together, and talked about family plots. We found stones bearing the names of town streets and parks, and talked about how town landmarks are often named after local pioneer leaders or the families who once owned the land. For example, we found this older stone bearing the name of Morton Green. Green Street is one of the major roads in our town, and I asked the kids if they thought maybe it was named after him. We came back home and confirmed via Google that indeed it was. And we also thought it was cool that we found a person born in the 1700s in the cemetery - not terribly common in this area of Indiana.
Cemetery Freestyling with Kids from GrowingLittleLeaves.com
Gravestone of Morton Green, one of our town's major street namesakes!
Autumn is a GREAT time to visit cemeteries, so whether you are traveling to a new place or sticking around your hometown, I encourage you to bring the kids to a cemetery - ANY cemetery - and see what you can all find and learn!

©2016 Emily Kowalski Schroeder

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13 Comments
Marian Wood link
9/28/2016 12:04:42 pm

Lots of good ideas for getting kids interested in family history and the meaning of cemeteries and headstones. Thanks for sharing.

Reply
Emily
9/28/2016 12:23:22 pm

Thank you for the kind words, Marian, and for reading my post!
~Emily

Reply
Kathleen Naylor link
9/28/2016 10:30:37 pm

Some great ideas! I took my 2-year-old on my last cemetery trip; it was a bit of a disaster for all concerned, but these are great ideas for making it work once he's a smidge more mature!

Reply
Emily
9/29/2016 01:14:58 pm

Hi Kathleen,

Thank you for stopping by my blog and reading! Let's face it - doing almost anything with a 2yo can end up a disaster but I think it's great that you tried! I think I started taking my kids when my youngest was four - it's much better! :-)

Reply
Andrea Kelleher link
9/29/2016 09:09:29 am

I love the term "Cemetery freestyling." Kids always notice the most interesting things, things that grown-ups often miss out on. This is something I can try with my own kids. Thanks for sharing!

Reply
Emily
9/29/2016 01:16:04 pm

Hi Andrea,

Thanks for stopping by and reading! Everything you say is SO true - my daughter was talking about the shapes and colors of the gravestones, which I usually don't notice, so she made me stop and think about it more!

Reply
David Taylor link
9/29/2016 09:45:16 am

I loved your ideas. Structure is important in a child's life, but sometimes we swing too far in that direction. Having time to let them explore what interests them and to begin making connections on their own is so important!

Thanks for your post!

Reply
Emily
9/29/2016 01:17:09 pm

Hi David,

Thanks for stopping by and reading! I agree - kids need time to be just kids, but they will still pick up things to learn even when they are having fun! ~Emily

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Linda Stufflebean link
9/29/2016 01:39:52 pm

What a fun day - only genealogists would say that, but it's great that your children enjoyed it AND had a learning experience.

Reply
Emily
9/29/2016 01:41:56 pm

Hi Linda!

Thank you for stopping by to read my blog post! We did have so much fun!
~Emily

Reply
Nicole link
9/29/2016 09:31:56 pm

My kids enjoy looking around cemeteries too! What great ideas for incorporating math and history. I'm excited to do this the next time we take a trip. Actually we are on fall break right now so maybe we will go to the cemetery around here. I can take photos with the Billion graves app and they can "freestyle." haha.

Reply
Elizabeth link
9/30/2016 08:42:37 pm

"Cemetery Freestyling"... glad to know there is a name for it! My family used to do this all the time when my descendant was younger. Now she says it's BORING. Can you imagine? Like you guys, we have no ancestors - nor family - where we live, so it's fun to check out the history at the local cemetery. It often explains where street and business names come from here in town. Thank you for sharing your post in the September Genealogy Blog Party! :-)

Reply
Linda link
10/25/2016 05:50:34 pm

Thank you for sharing. Taking children to cemeteries does help them learn respect for those who came before us and their grave markers as well. Children always need adult supervision while at a cemetery and be told not to not lean on or play around the gravestones. There are hazards in cemeteries such as poison ivy and uneven ground and as well as unstable gravestones. People should not visit cemeteries alone if possible. So, it a parent takes the necessary precautions and comes prepared, everyone should enjoy their visit and have a great learning experience!

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    Emily Kowalski Schroeder

    Founder and Author of Growing Little Leaves

    Emily Kowalski Schroeder / Founder and Author of GrowingLittleLeaves.com

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